Good Boy

Elisabeth Mann Borgese taught her dog to type. In her book The Language Barrier she explains that her English setter, Arli, developed a vocabulary of 60 words and 17 letters, though “He isn’t an especially bright dog.” “[Arli] could write under dictation short words, three-letter words, four-letter words, two-letter words: ‘good dog; go; bad.’ And he would type it out. There were more letters but I never got him to use more than 17.”

She began in October 1962 by training all four of her dogs to distinguish 18 designs printed on saucers; Arli showed the most promise, so she focused on him. By January 1963 he could count to 4 and distinguish CAT from DOG. Eventually she gave him a modified typewriter with enlarged keys, which she taught him to nose mechanically by rewarding him with hamburger. “No meaning at all was associated with the words,” she writes, though he did seem to associate meaning with words that excited him. “When asked, ‘Arli, where do you want to go?’ he will unfailingly write CAR, except that his excitement is such that the ‘dance’ around the word becomes a real ‘stammering’ on the typewriter. ACCACCAAARR he will write. GGOGO CAARR.”

(And it’s always tempting to discover meaning where there is none. Once while suffering intestinal problems after a long flight Arli ignored his work when she tried to get him to type GOOD DOG GET BONE, and then he stretched, yawned, and typed A BAD A BAD DOOG. This was probably just a familiar phrase that he’d chosen at random; Borgese estimated its likelihood at 1 in 12.)

Arli did earn at least one human fan — at one point Borgese showed his output to a “well-known critic of modern poetry,” who responded, “I think he has a definite affinity with the ‘concretist’ groups in Brazil, Scotland, and Germany [and an unnamed young American poet] who is also writing poetry of this type at present.”

| Literature · Oddities · Science & Math · Technology

Blades of Glory

https://www.google.com/patents/US2888703

I don’t know why this never caught on — in 1959 Klara Karwowska invented little windshield wipers for eyeglasses:

The present invention is directed to a wiper means for maintaining the lenses clean or clear of steam, rain, snow, or other foreign matter, and the wiper mechanism of the present invention includes a source of electrical energy such as the battery which may be secured to the frame in any suitable manner.

The battery would make them a little bulky, but that’s a small price to pay for clear vision. I could wear these in the shower!

| Technology

In a Word

chomage
n. cessation of labor

hospitize
v. to extend hospitality to

sequacious
adj. disposed to follow a leader

resipiscent
adj. brought back to one’s senses

I spent an evening at the house of the president of Harvard University. The party was waited on at tea by a domestic of the president’s, who is also Major of the Horse. On cavalry days, when guests are invited to dine with the regiment, the major, in his regimentals, takes the head of the table, and has the president on his right hand. He plays the host as freely as if no other relation existed between them. The toasts being all transacted, he goes home, doffs his regimentals, and waits on the president’s guests at tea.

— Harriet Martineau, Society in America, 1837

| Language · Society

MENACE

In 1960, British researcher Donald Michie combined his loves of computation and biology to consider whether a machine might learn — whether by consulting its record of past experience it could perform tasks with progressively greater success.

To investigate this he designed a machine to play noughts and crosses (or tic-tac-toe). He called it the Machine Educable Noughts And Crosses Engine, which gives it the pleasingly intimidating acronym MENACE. MENACE consists of 304 matchboxes, each of which represents a board position. Each box contains a collection of beads representing available moves in that position, and after each game these collections are adjusted in light of the outcome (as described here). In this way the engine learns from its experience — over time it becomes less likely to play losing moves, and more likely to play winning (or drawing) ones, and it becomes a more successful player as a result.

University College London mathematician Matthew Scroggs describes the engine above, and he’s built an online version that you can try out for yourself — it really does get noticeably better as it plays.

| Science & Math · Technology

Near and Far

Designed by Baroque architect Francesco Borromini in 1632, this gallery in Rome’s Palazzo Spada is a masterpiece of forced perspective — though it appears to be 37 meters long, in fact it’s only 8. The effect is produced by diminishing columns and a rising floor; the sculpture at the end, which Borromini contrived to appear life size, is only 60 centimeters high.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Spada_02.jpg
Image: Wikimedia Commons
| Art · Oddities · Science & Math

Ah

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Franz_Von_Stuck_-_The_Guardian_of_Paradise.jpg

A famous artist once painted an angel with six toes.

‘Who ever saw an angel with six toes?’ people inquired.

‘Who ever saw one with less?’ was the counter-question.

— Life, June 12, 1890

| Art · Humor · Religion

That Settles That

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:President_Nixon_with_his_first_term_cabinet.jpg

The famous mathematician Stanislaw Ulam thought of the following paradox, which is now known as the Ulam Paradox: When President Richard Nixon was appointed to office, on the first day he met his cabinet he said to them: ‘None of you are yes-men, are you?’ And they all said, ‘NO!’

— Raymond Smullyan, A Mixed Bag, 2016

| History · Science & Math

The Grapevine

A problem from the British Columbia Colleges Senior High School Mathematics Contest, 2000:

Not all of the nine members on the student council are on speaking terms. This table shows their relationships — 1 means two members are speaking to each other, and 0 means they’re not:

  A B C D E F G H I
A - 0 0 1 0 0 1 0 0
B 0 - 1 1 1 1 1 1 1
C 0 1 - 0 0 0 1 1 0
D 1 1 0 - 1 0 1 0 1
E 0 1 0 1 - 0 1 0 0
F 0 1 0 0 0 - 0 0 1
G 1 1 1 1 1 0 - 0 0
H 0 1 1 0 0 0 0 - 0
I 0 1 0 1 0 1 0 0 -

Recently councilor A started a rumor, and it was heard by each councilor once and only once. Each councilor heard it from, and passed it to, another councilor with whom she was on speaking terms. If we count councilor A as zero, then councilor E was the eighth and last councilor to hear the rumor. Who was the fourth?

Click for Answer
| Puzzles

An Orderly Alphabet

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:TYPEWRITERimage.jpg
Image: Wikimedia Commons

In the early days of typewriting, this was usually the first thing typed on each new typewriter after it rolled off the production line:

Amaranath sasesusos Oronoco initiation secedes Uruguay Philadelphia

A worker known as an aligner typed it to check that the resulting letters were aligned correctly on the platen.

How does it work? ‘Amaranath,’ the misspelled name of an imaginary flower, checks the alignment of the vowel ‘a’ between a number of common consonants. ‘Oronoco’ checks the ‘o’ key, while ‘secedes,’ ‘initiation’ and ‘Uruguay’ check three vowels that are among the most commonly used of all letters, ‘e,’ ‘i,’ and ‘u.’ ‘Sasesusos’ not only compares four of the five vowels in the same word against the baseline of the letter ‘s,’ but also ‘includes several of the most common letter combinations in twentieth-century business English.’ ‘Philadelphia’ checks the horizontal alignment of ‘i’ and ‘l,’ the narrowest letters on the keyboard.

What does “Amaranath sasesusos Oronoco initiation secedes Uruguay Philadelphia” actually mean? “Unlike most sentences, it was rarely spoken, and no one particularly cared what it might mean in the conventional sense.” (The “quick brown fox” came later.)

(From Darren Wershler-Henry, The Iron Whim, 2005.)

| Technology